My personal thoughts and experiences on confidence.
I’ve been getting a lot of questions on “how to be more confident.” I find this a very hard question to answer because there’s no set of guidelines that can help everyone become more confident. We’re all insecure about different things and have different background stories.
When I was younger, I was very insecure about my appearance and height. I was smaller than the rest of my classmates, didn’t own name brand or nice clothing, and have wild unruly hair. I was bullied in elementary school and all throughout middle school. It was hard for me to accept myself when all I heard were mean comments all day long from my elders and people at school on things I couldn’t control. Although some comments were meant to be a joke, they often hurt more than something I can laugh at.
Since then, a lot has changed and I really “glo’d up”. I don’t feel insecure. I love myself and every bit of who I am and I guess that’s where my confidence comes from – accepting who I am and believing in myself.
How did my personal growth take place?
In order to become confident, I had to throw out my old mentality. I stopped saying mean things to myself in the mirror like “I’m ugly”, “I’m fat”, “I’m skinny”, or “I can’t do this”. I wouldn’t ever talk to my friends like that so why am I like that to myself? There’s hundreds of other people out in the world that’s going to try to tear me down, why should I help them succeed?
My mindset changed and I became my own best friend and hype woman. It sounds a little crazy but talking yourself up will really help with confidence.
Some more ways to become more confident:
- Groom and dress yourself nicely – Wear what makes you feel confident.
- There’s no better way to feel confident than dressing up, getting a haircut, and having your brows look on point. When you look good, you feel good.
- Chin up, stand tall.
- There’s no way we can feel confident about ourselves if our body is saying otherwise — stop looking down, slouching, or walking like you’re nervous. I’ve read that our body posture can affect what we think about ourselves so trick your mind into feeling confident by having good posture.
- Surround yourself with people that provide genuine support and encouraging words.
- Energy is contagious and if you’re around people that bring bad vibes, it’s going to drain the life out of you. Real friends support one another and lift each other up.
- Confidence is not all about the mindset, it’s more about getting familiar.
- Whenever we don’t feel confident, it’s because we’re unfamiliar. For example, a lot of us aren’t confident at approaching strangers, doing interviews, or speaking in front of an audience; the reason is because we don’t do it often. But let’s say we do it 100x or more. Since we become more experienced, we know what usually happens so we’re comfortable and become more confident at it.
- Pick one feature that you’re most proud of and magnify it.
- I think some of us focus too much on our weaknesses instead of our strengths. It’s good to be aware of our weaknesses but don’t be so harsh or dwell on it. There’s tons of other good things about ourselves and we should celebrate that.
Aside from these advices, I know there’s some situations that can’t easily be resolved to feel confident. It takes time, practice, and courage to breakthrough. However, if you want to become more confident, it is POSSIBLE! It’s all up to you and how strong your desire for growth is. Don’t let fear hold you back. If there’s any thing you can do, whether it’s baby steps or giant leaps, get out there.
Confidence is a skill, not a special talent.51 People liked this post.